whoa its christmas?

so it has come to my attention that when you are away from the commercialization of holidays it is very easy to forget that they are upon us! halloween- well that came and went with barely any mention- we didnt even bother getting things together until 6 o clock the night of! when its not shoved in your face it is like every other day really....

in singapore the christmas decorations are already up. i was gaping open mouthed all the way down orchard that first morning- thinking what the hell have they got all this up for? then i realized its only about a month to christmas and i was hit by a wall of realization that i have NO idea where this year went! seems like it was just new years at nicks house playing beer pong and seeing fernando get smashed:)

so then with the realization that it is the 'holiday season' came the realization that this is the first christmas i have been single in a couple of years and well i kinda forgot how much that sucks!! for the rest of the year its pretty inconsequential- i am happy with my situation and really dont ever feel that lonely. but when it comes to this time of year, well it becomes downright depressing!! all these people out christmas shopping, couples on holidays, cuddling every where . blech. way to rub it in. all of a sudden you realize that being alone may be great most of the time but having someone at this particular time of year is almost worth being in a relationship- well- almost....maybe i should just try and find a 'christmas boyfriend' we will be together for the months of november until the end of january- just to get through all this crap without having to feel so monumentally sad that you have to drink hot chocolate alone while you do your shopping and fear that one day you will indeed be the living incarnation of bridget jones on christmas eve with the bottle of vodka singing celine dion in your footie pajamas!!!

note- for christmas this means i do NOT want any kind of pajamas- they will only further fuel the fear that my life is steadily heading into thirties alone-ness...bottles of vodka are always welcome:)

what they say is not in fact true....

in singapore for visa stu ff so advanced apologies for the dullness of my subsequent blogs....but i wouldnt want to leave my four followers high and dry and i am aware of how important it is for me to feed them daily with lacivious and juicy stories so i will try not to disapoint:)

jon told me that he read/saw some sudy that singaporeans were the fastest walkers in the world. ummmmm what??? i was thinking about that yesterday as i fought my way desperately through the throngs of SLOW ASS people every where i went. no joke it took me like twenty mintues to get from the MRT station to wisma atria...yeah- they are connected. they must have timed an expat who was on a mission to fight through these crowds and was walking like i was yessterday- with a purpose!!

mel and i went out for a drink thursday night- true to our bali habits we didnt leave the house until midnight, however thi s not being kuta, it was a little late!! we went to clark quay and it was pretty busy but i swear the culture shock of being back around things like that was showing on my face !! i felt like i was in a daze a little bit- everything was moving so fast, there was so much lights and people and whoa it was sensory overload! haha

mel and i were giddy at the thought of getting back there and we were disapointed with the scene at CQ- mainly beuycase we are so addicted to the dsigustingness of kuta. we are well aware of our problem!

but i also realized it is very easy to slip back into life wherever you are. by the next morning i was up and shopping the island- going to the club with dad, MRT'ing all over the place ( cabs are RIDICULOUS now - my taxi from the airport was 5o bucks....)

more later:)

Go team!

it is a testament to my state over the last few days that i have not blogged since sunday or something!! let me give you a recap of them events that have transpired...those that i can remember anyways!

the last few days - before i left for singapore - were ragers. monday = out tuesday= out and wednesday yes again = out. and im pretty sure i saw the sun rise all three mornings. needless to say during the days i had a massage/died on the beach so nothing to report there:)

some highlights:

monday night- hmmm hard to remember...

tuesday night- where did we go? oh but our helmets got stolen! yeah that would be the second helmet i have had stolen in my six weeks in bali! this time it was off jons bike on legian in kuta....we stumbled out of embargo to find that not only had our helmets been taken but every helmet of of every bike on the whole street was gone! i suppose that is what they dispatch those little begging children to do when there are not that money people wandering the streets!! oh yes ythis was the night i found myself in a bizzare triangle, well more like the abba 'square' of dramas!! kinda funny though- involving girlfriends, americans and a crazy scotsmen. these events led us to really realize how small this island is ....

wednesday night- my last night with jon! we went for a nice dinner at ku de ta before inventing a new card game that we have named SLAPS...we also tried to play 500 with two people...it was not a good time- it was too muhc of an emotional roller coaster - you either won or lost real bad!haha then back out where we found honey - a wasted wasted honey in her typical glory ( sweaty mess, surrounded by men and doing her 'im-dancing-with-you-kinda-while-faliling-my-limbs-out-and--grabbing-other-people' moves! she is great:) we kinda formed a litte crew of people including me jon and nick, the american surfer, the old scotsmen, a guy with lusciously long blonde hair named shanti, honey, her sister and the two latinso guys obsessed with honey. jon actually almost got in a fight with one of them- defeneding long-haired hippy man. can you say REAL WORLD BALI?

there was way too much jungle juice involved that night and i had to pack the next day and make my way to the airport. i am suffering from some major PKDS right now- sitting in singapore with my parents watching the daily show on my dads computer- uh wasnt i just here, doing exactly this?? i am achey, sweaty, reeking of booze and somehow i still want to go out- what is wrong with me- am i sick?? i feel like an addict who has just had their crack pipe taken away- im desperate to scratch my itch......its disgusting. but as jon and i discovered last night at dinner, all good things must come to an end and six weeks of this partying has taken its toll..it has to end sometime and we had a good run:) ok ok ok i do not have the will power and will probably continue my ways through to christmas and will come back in february with a renewed purpose- or just a purpose in general would be good;)

in singapore tonight- supposed to hang with mel and her work crew - i have a feeling that i will have lunchbag- singapore going out scene is SO much different then bali! i like both though- but like i said im like a crazed addict who knows that their vice is the worst thing in the world but feeding it has become some sort of ferocious creature of its own....i must do it. PKDS.

as for jon- well im deeply saddened that our time has come to an end...however i have to pat myself on the back becuase jon has told me that i passed the test and that he would live with me again! WOOT! looks like all my attempts at being a horrid roomate have gone unnoticed and i am back in the game:) i mean who could resist- he got to see my butt every morning when he woke up and i had the sheets kicked off because it is like a sauna in our room! how charming am i? haha then there was the infamous 'cigerette incident' where i left him alone in embargo, the drive home from dhyana pura where i bit him and the time that i almost got us killed on poppies! ah roomie i will miss you:) global will just not be the same, everytime i have a juice and a sandwich i will feel a twinge of sadness that you are not there to get the mixed juice and tuna. who will i go to pleo with and say 'towel' ? who will be my beach boyfriend ( JUST FRIENDS DAMMNIT!) ? who will accidentally chop cake in the upstairs bathroom right before i need to brush my teeth? outdoor warung will never be the same- in fact i just dont know if i can go there anymore. but they have the best tempeh....hmmm....who will watch white guys fall 'in love at first sight' with ho hos and make fun of the ridiculous dancing that goes on in the sausage fest that is sky garden? i am already feeling very lost with out you...

ps i saw the real than last night- REAL drunk! he was a sweaty slobbering mess and in his stupor he was blabbing on to me about how he has 'yellow fever' and will never be able to go back to white women ( thank GOD for all of us!!!!) he slurred a bunch of nonsense to me and the next time i saw him he was knee deep in ho ho ...

so you will be missed:)

wednesday night-

i forgot...

i forgot to mention that we saw the ten year old model at the beach yesterdaY!!!!!! hahaha its only crazy because we were at a beach that is farther out and not like the common beach that peopl would go too! but there she was prancing around in all her model-ness! mel and i waved at her and at first she looked apprehensive- then mel said 'you are a model arent you?' and she flashed the biggest grin and i swear did a runway pose and nodded! then galloped off-- half way up the stairs she looked back and realized who we were and she squeeled like a true ten year old "HIIIIIIIIII" it was too cute....

we also saw a recently married couple taking pics and videos of them on the beach....they were wearing all white and playing in the sand and frolicking about in the water....we thought it was so cute until we noticed the guy had a huge rip in his pants and we kept getting flashed bits and pieces.......ewwwwwww eventually they fell over fully into the water ( a small mishap while attempting some sort of running jump hug thing...) so then both were in all white and were all wet...yeah you can imagine! kinda like nick in his white linen pants with no underwear post-pool incident!!!!

weekend update...without tina fey or amy poehler.

first things first- i just witnessed a fight!! of all places ( considering the amount of time spent in the bars/clubs of kuta!) it was in the internet cafe that we go to!! i dont know what it was about because i dont speak bloody french, but i saw a guy walking towards me and hear another one yelling stuff at him then i see the other person run up behind him and whip him around and HEAD BUTT hIM! they started like full on brawling and three other foreign guys jumped up an ran over to pull them apart right before they went over the ledge of the balcony to the meat store below!!!!! imprtant side note- they were old. second important side not- within five minutes they were hugging it out....what the hell????

so saturday was a bust in my opinion- and i know that i should learn to love being a lone blah blah, but still- its like whenever you want to be alone ( which i do actually want a lot of the time!!) there are always people around and you cannot get it. but when you are not in the mood to stew around in your own head, that is innevitably when everyone you know falls off... miraculously i wasnt faced with hangover death on saturday and actually felt quite good and ready to do something fun saturday- last saturday night with me and jon and mel all being here together!!

but mel had had to work saturday and that kinda killed her so she fell asleep at nine pm. yeah nine. jon was going on a date and insisted that we would meet up after and nick was also on a date. ( notice that i did not put 'date' because these were actually dates, without the need for mockery or 'supposed' inclinations.) so i waited. in my bored waiting i txtd/called everyone on i know ( well in the same time zone at leasT!) desperate for something to do- even someone to talk to for like five minutes. and literally NOTHING. everyone i know ignored me. shady business ( ps its not like i know a lot of people!!)

so yeah, at like 12 30 jon lets me know that meeeting up will not be happening * yeah no kidding* so after reading almost my whole book i sourly went to bed. dont get me wrong, being alone can be nice and sometimes staying at home on a saturday night is physically so attractive it hurts but not that night. that night i felt scorned and lonely....booo....

but i woke up sunday feeling much better and it was actually a fantastic day! we drove down to uluwatu- the surfers paradise beach. we had meant to go to balangan which is apparently three beaches before, but we were with jay and zando and they were a litttle confused! so we ended up scoping out dreamland, which i am infatuated with. punch me cus i didnt bring my camera. but mel did so i can get some pics from her! in the meantime i am going to cheat and include some i found on the internet just to show how amazing this place is!! hey at least im honest about it;)

we drove b ack down to balangan which was so relaxing ( nice not to be hassled to buy sarongs and t shirts and other wooden items of little use!) the sand was white down there, but really coarse, like completely coral. the water was warm and the waves were small but the bottom was rock-like coral, mossy and slippery and covered in unideintifiable creatures!! so we had fun freaking eachother out and trying to stay in low crouched positions without drowning or stepping on the slimy rocks!

that was the furthest i have gone on my motorbike alone- just have to mention that i will forever want to be on a motorbike. its the best. and my scar is looking beautiful:)

also like to point out that on the beach there was a shack selling food and we had soup and banana pancakes and i ate some and liked it. yeah. LIKED IT!:)

on our way home we stopped at double six beach for the fire and drum show but the impeding rain had scared off most of the ddrummers. but jay and moon and everyone were down there playing fire so we bought beers and sat on the beach watching the sun do down and the fire twirling! i made a video of mel...idk if it will work on here but i will try- oh wait no its on my phone...hmmm i will work on that!

we also all went for a night swim - which normally is like pure terror to me- especially last night since the moon was virutally non existant hiding behind clouds so the water was pitch black and melted back into the horizon, seamlessly creating a velvety dark vastness. the only thing you could see was the crests of the waves as they broke, but you couldnt see anything until the wave was upon you and crshing!! but i sukced it up and made myself do it and it was amazing!!! oh yeah- the other beacon of light was jons naked white butt...he took off his underwear and was body surfing in the buff- he kept trying to aim for people and we would scramble away terrified of having his uncle dick and the twins too close for comfort!!


more fire and a late dinner later we all said goodbye to jay ( off to india today for a while) and made it home around 1 or so. one of those days that you just can stop thanking someone for making possible:)

adendum...

do to the recent backlash from a certain someone, i am being forced to make mention of last nights events....apparently my blog is also being used as someones personal journal ( they are just too lazy to record things on their own and enjoy reading about their escapades on my blog...)

so jon has taken a new stance on nights out and it is a sober one. hmmm... however- last night he managed to pull three numbers!! and real girls- not ho hos!!

for the rest of us it was long island night- due to the shortage of actual drinkable alcohol, the pickings are slim. and not everywhere has arak so we had to be flexible;) i did however find out from our particularly chesticle-like waiter at dinner that the alcohol shortages happen before big hindu ceremonies or holidays and this week was the full moon and that was a huge deal for them....
6!!
anyways, last night was the most packeed i have seen sky garden- meg it was nuts!!!! we went to some 'model' party on dyana pura first- it was lame but there was a great DJ so me and mel and honey just danced and danced. we met this ten year old indonesian model who was teaching us how to catwalk. she was stunning but soooo going to be a trainwreck by the time she is 16!! i am including a photo becuase she was redick! sucks when the most beutiful girl in the bar is a ten year old...puts us to shame!! haha

so then to kuta after the torrential downpour ( thet kept us at the 'model' party for way too long!!!) ocean beach ( sucked but it rained again:) saw our bounder friends again- one of them told me that he has a 'thing' for me. he literally said that in his broken english i was like- er- thanks, but you have a ponytail that is longer then mine and your chesticles are too big!

jon however did well- got three numbers last night and today is carrying around a dictionary ( making out in indonesian is the name) and is using it to translate all the texts he is receiving from his recently aquiried women!!

off for a massage....how did life get this good??

embargaining.....

as promised i will be blogging about 'feelings' not 'the amazing funnies that were last night....' ok well i might have to mention things but i swear it willbe what is just coming out it is not intentional. im trying to please the grandparents. i need to secure that inheritance;) yeah ryan- i will be getting SOME of it! haha all your efforts are wasted.....

ok so today i am going to discuss the enigma that is people- seriously. i will never understand them. there is a serious range of random and weird people here- when you visit you dont really see it because i think they hide out in places that are not to be found on poppies or pantai kuta. although those people continue to confuse me as well. i love people, dont get me wrong. in fact my desire to be around new and different people is one of the driving factors for why i am here- what i remember most about that time i was in bali - summer after graduating high school-is that i was totally enthralled by the amount of people there were to meet and i- being trusting and a little tooo much sometimes, i love talking to people. i like to make connections and as those who know me best will confirm i have a habit of connecting to those who are very far away from me. but what can i say- its not about where you live its about what is shared between two people and that can exist on so many different levels. there are people you meet who you know will have an impact on your life- its weird how you can physically feel the difference- knowing that someone is going to continue to be part of your life and knowing that someone is going to have no real impact are very clear and decise feelings.

i like both- i love to have a night talking to someone random, feeling a connection that you know will only last for the duration of the conversation. when you run out of things to say ( or the jungle juice runs dry;) you know that is it. but you are ok and you move on because that person contributed what they were supposed to and that is enough. but other people you cannot seem to let go, no matter how resistant life may be to allowing the connection to continue.

(insert- diet coke is saving my life right now....i know it is also simultaneously rotting away my precious teeth, but still, i could care less at the moment;)

so as for people, like i was saying, as much as you may feel you can discern just through intuition and perception, they are the most confusing bunch. i swear i will never get it. i am throwing in the towel and surrendering- i will forever be confused by people and their actions. not writing myself out of the equation- i realize i most likely can be very confsuing myself- but at least I always understand my intentions:)as for others, perhaps i will lower my expectations and stop making assumptions. i swear i am trying to be as open minded and accepting as possible but isnt it ok to know what you want and what you like and to be discerning about who you let in? i know that judging people is bad, but i have also learned from a very dear friend, that sometimes letting any and everyone in can blow up in your face. seriously certain friend- i will never fall victim to your ways.....SS for life though;)

Horrifying ( but Hilraious) update....

So i just talked to shar ( aka my mom) and she has informed me of some interesting news...

while in the states recently she decided to give my grandparents ( the ones who still think bush should be president) my blog address. note- i specifically aknowledged the fact that my grandparents do not have a computer, nor internet access, so i did not have to worry about the shock that this blog may cause them.

however, after my mom talking about how good it was and how interesting blah ( this was , as she said, in the early days where i discussed more 'feelings' ) so naturally, as according to murphys law- my grandparents up and decided to make a trip to the library, where they no doubt had some poor exasperated librarian trying to show them how to use the computer.

upon log in, they were greeted with the latest sstory of my debaucherous night out. although i still maintain that my stories can be relatively 'grandparent friendly' BUT they did also happen to notice the pictures of my 'followers'. for those of you who may not have scoped this out, rishi is a 'follower' and his pic is of him in a giant penis costume.

so of course he goes to tell my mom that my blog has a dick on it. he is less then thrilled. he said my grandmother didnt know what it was and she was trying to figure it out and he had to tell her it was a 'dick'. needless to say i do not think they will be returning to this site......ahahahahahha

as for shar's comment on my recent posts being to much about partying, i will try to incorporate more 'feelings' back into it, i just thought i was boring people!!

apparently I am Emo....

GOOD NEws! Mel and I have found a new place to live!!! not that i dont have lots of love for shitbox number 24, and that i am not going to miss the bat cave, no privacy and a maid who washed my cloths without soap..... i will indeed miss all those things, as well as the mattress on the floor, the sand EVERYWHERE and the cat that is in constant heat!!

i will indeed miss jon but he is taking off and not coming back for sure so until then mel and i decided that we wanted to have something a little more homey feeling...so this woman, linda, is friends with the people who own the house we are in now and she stopped in one day under the pretense of saying hi but we knew she was 'checking in' on the house to see if it was still standing and who was living there, etc.

so linda turns out to be really nice- an australian clothing designer who spent most of her time on the west coast of north america. she is kinda quiet and admittedly a recluse and likes to just do her work and watch movies in her room at night. so she has a house that she has paid for for the year and her two roomates have moved out so yesterday mel and i went to check it out and its amazing!

the house is quite big, there is her work space, a kitchen and living room with all these pillows and alow table, a pool and a bedroom downstairs. upstairs will pretty much be me and mels area, two bedrooms plus a little alcove that we are going to make into a hang out/office area with some sort of 'bed' so that people can stay over. the house is fully ffurnished- the beds are NOT on the floor!!!!! my room is smaller and has no AC but i am going to be paying less- she is also letting us pay month to month which is so great because it means there are no comittments for anyone. so if it doesnt work out for wahtever reason we can find a new place, and i wont have to give a whole bunch of money upfront so much better:)

KP if you are reading this- and you better be because you are slacking--thanks for reassuring my belief in people this morning:)

"ice skating" in bali

the other day we decided to go find this 'movie theater' yeah there is only one! so we found it and they only have one enlglish movie and one bahasa movie at at time and currently it was the new james bond. but sold out. like hours in advance. so now we are at this mall and mel says they have ice skating, but she heard there is a height limit, like just for kids. but we wanted to see anyways!

in the middle of the mall there is thie tiny little rink- we go inside, thinking hey at least it will be cold in here...no. not only is it not cold, b ut virtually its the same temperature as outside...hmm... first of all the skates were like serious ankle breakers...they were plastic and hot pink and totally didnt lace up properly or have any sort of support. upon further inspection we noticed that they didnt have blades really either....the ice looked dirty and really scraped up and smelled funny....we looked closer...

the 'ice' was wax. yeah. it was a floor covered in wax that they were skating on. no wonder it wasnt cold!!! a few pics...dont know if they demonstrate how ridiculously funny this was. however they did indeed even having a person dressed up in a giant animal costume 'dancing' on the 'ice'. classic.

steak and nudity anyone?

So yesterday i was pretty much a waste of space...along with jon... i wrote a whole blog post about how annoying and nasty my morning was but in true fashion of 'when it rains in pours', my blog post got erased somehow so i decided to say NM on that...

today is better- we fought off the urge to go out AgAIn last night and i was asleep in the princess bed by ten pm... watching the wendall baker story-- worst movie ever jon. seriously though- not funny, not interesting, not anything. boo on your movies choices!

i do have some pics to put up of the other night- my favorite being of the hairy looking guy dancing with jon behind him...i saw that and was like uhMMMM? who is that?? haha apparently he was dancing it up with us on the Mbargo stage ...i dont recall. things got blurry after bounty and then they come back into focus with me and jon almost dying down poppies as we were 'looking for another bar'????? what?? haha so yeah instead we found mcdonalds and i ate the best cheeseburger of my life. not really. it tasted like pickles and we were surrounded by some of the most obnoxious drunk aussies ever. but still. without it i think i would have fallen off the back of jons bike ( he told me to just bike his shoulder and hold on!) hahah

we ate at rio again last night...i actually had red meat- been a long time- and it was uhmazing. mel said she was sso full she wished she wasnt wearing leggings becuase they were cutting into her stomach and then she said she just wanted to eat her steak naked. jon pointed out that most men would probaly not object to a girl wanting to eat a steak naked and hence a new fetish was born....

today mel and i went to see a house.....guess what same house i have seen four times now! seirously, all these different people we know keep taking us to this sammmmmme house!!!! there is nothing really wrong with it its just kinda a little much for what it is- no furniture and that is just an additional headache to take on so i feel like if it is going to have no furniutre it better be pretty cheap! so still on the hunt.....

ahem....

to those of you who have asked for some censorship it is unfair to be now asking for more fo....you know who you are! trust me- some things should remain un-blogged!!

last night nick and i went to dinner - we wanted to check out a new place so we scoped out the italian places on oberoi and picked one based on the number of good looking people there were sitting in each one! haha- apparently this amazingly pretty italian girl is how we cemented the final decision to go to trattoria...

so seated amongst the 'good looking people' we had a lovely dinner actually-- that is, until a little inch worm/slug thing crawled out of the 'salad' on nicks plate...i say it like that because it was literally shredded lettuce, browning and everything, accompanying his random meal of over cooked french fries and some pork busines..it was weird looking to say the least but when the bug climbed up out of it he was like yeaaaaaah that is it for me! haha

i have to give them credit though- this place actually cared about the problem- the waitress whipped it away so fast, apologizing and saying let me get you something else, something else. then the manager came over ( really sweet italian lady) and felt awful about it and she recomended something else for him to have ( some kinda pasta)

the next most exciing pat of the dinner was when nick , talking about his ex- girfriends inability to, uh, have the big 'o', the people at the table behind us started cracking up....nick is loud- for those of you who dont know- his nickname is now TM (tm) for talking machine and he sometimes forets that there are other people in the close vicinity. needless to say he did not phrase it the way i did- instead he was like " well after being with a girl for 13 years who never had an orgasm......) yeah. these people wer dying and i swear, if nick could blush he would have been flaming!!! what i also realized at dinner last night...we need to find nick a girlfriend like stat- he was just checking out every single female that walked by...examining their walks, commenting on their clothes, their bodies their faces. i mean i know that guys are shallow and materialistic but he was like outta control last night!!

i gotta say though- we have definately discovered that bali is full of guys. its not that there are not fantastically beautiful women, but we only see them on the street or at the beach- and they are 9 times outta ten, with their BF's or husbands or something. nevertheless, there are rearely any good looking women out in the bars ( that are not prostitues i mean) well, hookers, or 18 year olds that are smashed outta their heads. so yeah i mean the selection is kinda tough. the problem too is that the bars in our areas are kinda an older crowd- like not the sexy older, the older older. haha. granted we have only scoped the like a few minutes one time and i would b e willing to try again! so yeah, for the guys, there are not so many 'normal' girls to pick from- saturday night was like the most ridiculous i have ever seen it. Mbargo was virtually all dudes and hookers ( and me mel and honey- the only non-hooker women that were there!!) we went for like two seconds, found the swiss doctors from the night before and went back to skygarden- where while more empty, had a far better vibe!

sad news- time is going to quickly!! i have to leave on the 20th for visa stuff and then when i come back jon will be gone......v sad day that will be. although i annoy the crap out of him and most of the time i think he hates me, i will miss singing on the back of his bike and wondering to bounty to take shots of arak. and who will i get ignored by in the morning when i wake up? who will sit across from me at global and not talk to me for two hours?? most importantly who will be mean to me during 500??? ah im going to miss him. here's to jon getting rich and coming back in january:)

hmm

it seems there are more and more things that i am being asked " not to blog" about so now im struggling to find interesting stories to tell! haha lots of weird business went on this weekend that i cannot discuss on this forum ....

lets just say the energy or 'vibe' of the little group we have assembled here is crackling with juiciness!!!

i dont have any new info to share other then that, however, i do have to say that this weekend i really decided that i love my life here. while everyday i miss people who i no longer have with me, i am incredibly happy here and i love where i am. i love that i get to tell people i am a writer when the questions 'what do you do?' comes up and for the first time ever i get to say something back that i am proud of! its actually interesting:) i love meeting so many new people- every day or night we encounter new people and have new experiences. while it must sound like we arent doing a whole lot, to me it is what i was looking for and i feel content right now. its not a vacation for us over here, its life, it just happens to be a spectacularly easy going one:) i realized something this weekend while helping deal with some of the 'things' that happened, and that is for the first time, like ever, (haha) i am not involved in any drama. i have tied up my loose ends and am moving forward with things and that no longer scares me or makes me feel sad. there are things in your life that are not meant to be and the only way to truley live without regret is to accept and move on when you are given the chance. the changes may be subtle and its weird that it is true- one day you just wake up and the hurting and the confusion are gone. i dont feel lonely anymore, but rather excited to have so many opporunities to create new friendships and connect with people. one thing-- we have to find a new house!! while i love shitbox , the more friends we make, the more ridiculous it is to have them come to your house with a disclaimer -- pembantu room or bat cave??

bat girl strikes....

mel thinks i should rename the blog - partying in kuta. haha i told her though if i blogged about what i do during the day ( work,, massage, beach) it wouldnt be very interesting and it seems that no one seemed to care to comment on my 'feelings' posts so i am sticking to entertaining the masses with tales of ridiculous nights out! and god we have been having them a lot ....

nicks bday- we found an amazing restaurant actually- he wanted steak so we went to this place called RIO - we were laughing cus evereything on the menu had "chef's recommendation' after it....literally everything! but turns out we all scraped our plates clean...jon was eating th parsley and my salad scraps just so he could wipe it acorss his plate an nick ate my tomato center that i left...yeah. great food- horrible horrible band that consisted of two dudes and a keyboard- it was like watching ross in that friends episode where he plays his 'music' . the power went out twice ( seems this is something to get used to during rainy season) its funny cus no one even seems to flinch, just going on with their dinner! at least it wasnt hot like manekepis.. we went there the other night and it was hot as hell to start with - ac broken and the fan was missing us by a fraction. the power went out at the end of dinner and we just about lost it - seriously we were bathed in sweat and even our waitress ( who up until this point had done her best to virtually ignore us) came over to light another candle and looked straight at us with a deadpan look and said " its like hell" . hahahahaha amazing

so after dinner we went home and surpised nick with his ice cream cake- he was so excited! played some 500 hundred to warm up while toasting our vodka-guava-sodas...mmm we heard the thunder rolling in and decided to beat the rain and head into kuta....went to ocean beach ahwere damian saint- former resident DJ at MOS in singapore was spinning. somehow we got up into the DJ booth and were dancing with some frenchies ( gay ones apparently who had an affinitiy for a move we now call the Squat Thrust) everyone kinda disperesed on difeerent missions but i stayed in the booth and got a lesson on spinning- the guy was relly nice and was like talking me through everything he was doing which was awesome. so yeah....from my perch i watched nick get thrown into the pool ( wearing white linen pants with no underwear -- yeah-- strangly he had packed extra clothes in his bike so saved us all a 'show')

from ocean beach we went to skygarden but it was not that great- a lotta dudes, old kinda, no cute ones and manya whore. so off to mbargo once again. we hava a new favorite way to drink in mbargo that allows for maximum danceage and mobility- buying a jungle juice and getting a shot glass-- this way you can pour shots into your mouth while dancing -- also a good way to make friends ( see "jon closes down Mbargo with a drunk aussie guy" later in the blog)

made friends with some guys from switzerland, then one of them usurped the 'girl' that jon was chatting up ( i dont know why they bother- its not like he is going to pay for it in the end?!) the other guy's last name was Kaelin!! so in the event that i marry him, i will be kaelen kaelin, so we would have to hyphenate to kaelen morris kaelin. haha

while mel will insist that it did not happen this way, she suggested we go to la vida loca ( the 'whorerible' bar on double six from wed night....we kinda got seperated around againa nd by thte time i got to double six there was only jon and our swiss friend! mel aparently never showed up ... so yet another sun rise is watched from the sands of double six beach- although this morning we could accosted by kids and women begging for money- one of them actually told me she hated me and i should never comeb ack to bali. yeah what a sweety.

so alas no trip to lovina this am- we all slept quite late and have been somewhat retarded all day! jay has a big show tonight that he choroegraphed so *sigh* loooks like we are headed out again! the only prob is that the show starts at 8 50.....and just cus we go out early we would like to think that means we will go home early. but i have a feeling it doesnt work likt that!!

ps i love my life!

making up words...

we invented a phrase the other night and i want to know what everyone thinks it might mean:

if you are going to "chop the cake" what are you going to do?

(this would be a time for all you who 'insist' you read my blog but refuse to leave comments. if your lazy ass doesnt want to create a blogger profile that is fine- but you all have facebook so put it on my wall or a msg if you think it might be innapropriate...i mean who are we kidding its me and jon and mel its definately inapropriate!)

restaurant reviews...

i have decided that i am going to spontanesouly include various restaurant reviews. i am struck by the ridiculousness that is the bali dining scene. there are serious like a billion restaurants, so nothing is ever 'full' but even the empty dead places seem to have ridiculously good food (except for SOHO were im currently sitting , even thought it is like the easiest food to make....) anwyays we go out a lot ( well everyday) cus it is cheaper then buying food and seeing as we one one kettle and one frying pan, the extent of cooking that happens is instant mee goreng or frozen naan. occasionalyl some past happens.....

so the first restaurant is what inspired me to discuss the adventures we have had while dining out..it is called Burger and Wine Bar. seriously. so we drive by it alot and every time jon says oo i wanna try that- seeing as he loves him a good burger ( and can always convince mel that meat must be had right away!) it is no suprise that i get the call to meet them there for dinner. i arrive at the swanky modern place, all reds and blacks and very comfortable. i sit down to jon and mel with shit eating grins on their face...im blabbing away about something that just happened and they cannot stop smiling. jon passes me a menu and they both watch as i start to puruse the options..... a few glances in and my eyes widen in absolute shock. did they really just describe a burger as 'oozing cum of gorgonzola??" oh yeah they did.....this posh little joint has a menu that is completely erotic and the word COCK is dancing all over the page. it was insane- they actually compare what a 'normal burger' would be (see photo of menu) and then compared to their "well hung beef" burgres.

so apparently the way it works is they come in little mini burger versions. there are only five options on the menu. that is it. no other options just five sexually descriptive burger options. mel and i dedcide to split one and jon goes it on his won. the burgers arrive , three bitty baby burgers each the size of a US quarter, and that is it. all running upwards of ten dollars, this is just too funny for us to take anymore. admittedly it was probably the best mini morsel of meat i ever put in my mough ( all one and a half of them i ate..) but the price was laughable. as for their wine list, well if you can get over the COCK- tails ( deep throat is one of them) then you make it to a page with like five wines on it ( they probably only actually had one of them...this is a running trend here!)

bathroom was really nice- apparently they spent so much money on it that they didnt have enough to buy a lotta meat ( hence the mini burgers) all in all intersting concetp with the most ridiculous exceuction...ps it was totally empty except for us and the standard 12 staff members!

scissors me timbers on a wednesday night!

team scissor sisters got broken up last night in 500 ...it wasnt pretty.
after a few hands of a seriously cut throat game of 500 jay and honey came over ( we were all supposed to go to that thing at double 6 but it was pouring and expensive so instead we drank some beers at the shit box and all of sudden the rain stops at 1 am and we have hit the go button...to kuta we go to watch melanie play drums at embargo- next thing we know the sun has come up....

jon and mel are dmonstrating how to 'lead with the pelvis' hey when in kuta, do as the asutralian tourists do! haha oh man last night though there was some random dude who would not leave me alone, kept trying to dance with me and was like yeah? yeah? and i would stop dancing and completely like freeze and curl in and try to avoid him touching me. i mean how many other ways are there to say ' no thanks. plesas stop that now.' finally nick went over and said something to him and he disapeared. i dont care if he told em i had the herp or something i am just he was gone! helps having a big intimidating roomate:)

apparently there are copious amounts of photos of jon and i were one or both of our tongues are out and we are half attempting to face lick each other. upon further investigation it does appear to be true- why? who knows....but we played it up for our demanding audience one more time!!

we ended up going to some shady place on double 6 - aptly naming it "Whore-e-scope" ...we decided that beach was more fun and were see sawing and swinging on the beach playground ( until some swollen chesticled man tried to massage me on the see saw!!!) honey and melanie were all about the boobs ( well eachotheres more specifically) what a wonderful way to watch the sun come up- paritally blocked by two girls grabbing each other mercilessly!

meeting ajourned....

just finished meeting for newsletter number 2 and am awaiting meeting for corporate briefing.....

things i wrote about earlier that got erased ( now more brief versions:):

i had lunch for a dollar today- tempeh and rice and vegggies and a bottle of water for one us dollar....soon our dollars will have the face of obama on them YAY AMERICA:) you didnt disapoint!!

the other night i conquered a fear of mine- i had never had a meal out at a restuarant alone. never. so the other night i treated myself to a nice dinner and some wine at grocer and grind ..i brought my computer but their wireless wasnt working so i had just me:) oh wait, i did have my trusty book - haha!

lydia i wanted to tell you that my tan has reached saturation level- remember when we thought we werent getting darker so we would wake up at 8 am and lay out in straight oil for hours? and still we thought we were white and then we saw pics and we looked like mel!! haha well that is how i feel now....im working on it but its a lot harder when you are 25 to be as irresonsible as we were at 18 so im trying to refrain from oils of any kind......;)

we are going to see digweed and nick warner at double 6 tonight...putting on my dancing shoes;) maybe i will continue with fear conquerage and do the bungy jump on my motorbike!! jk shar- seriously im just kidding!!!

grrrrr

i just wrote a really nice and long post and my computer froze and i lost it. so now i will just say that laurie reminded me of a time in paddies when a hooker was spitting on me becuase i was in 'her territory' ..... these ones were much nicer:)

ocean beach on a sunday...n

sunday night jon and i were fueled by our most heaty enemy- red wine- and decided staying at home was lame. so we went to meet our friends in kuta at OB where nights before the mania had begun! however this time, it was absudrly hot ( see insert of jons 'sweat hawk' and a campur of people! for instance we were with the 'factory outlet' of prostitues ( long story as to why we were with them but that doesnt need to be told...) so the factory outlet is a name that apparently originated in high school to describe a certain ( who shall remain nameless) group of girls who all appeared to be attractive buton closer inspection had soething just a bit off. also my faveorite pic is the one where jon is standing with the nine year old the twelve year old and the prostitute....where else but in bali?!

ITS THE REAL ETHAN!!! if you remember back a few stories- we met this guy one night becuase we thought it was ethan from USC and i was like HEEEYYYYY turns out not to be him.....anyways, halloween night brought us to the REAl ethan who was being REAL ridiculous!! he also had no chance at winning goofiest costume becuase shaving cream knickers guy creamed the competition ( get it??? hahahahahha)

pics as promised:)

to the male version of me.....

ok ok so you can have your own blog blurb but only in fair trade for some pictures that i didnt manage to take!! although your pictures of me are horrible. thanks for that mate! seriously though it was really nice to be reminded that people are not always what they seem and that spending a whole day being completely lazy and useless you can learn a lot about someone else. even wolves in sheeps clothing like yourself! i cannot believe i thought you were nice....haha:) thanks for the many pineapple juices and keep taking on a stance on not paying for women:) seriously though. dont do it!! thanks for making me smile and laugh and even though i only qualify as a 2 outta 3 on your scale i still found it endearing to be in your company! ( mainly because it was like being with myself and im awesome:)

as for the future- remember that you are doing what you are doing for a reason and it will pay off in less then a year when you get to take off and start making those 'amazing moments' happen for yourself. then maybe next time our paths cross you will have an answer to that one! many answers hopefully! maybe along your travels you can learn to dance- like properly:) stop leaving t shirts in cabs cus next time you wont be as lucky and use that pout lip to get things you want ( im telling you it works:)

halloween stories must come out....i dont have the pics yet!!

i know i know general consensus is that you all need more visual stimulus then actual words to be interested so i do indeed have halloween pics (as reviewed this am there are not that many ;) but some nonetheless! but i want to get everything out while its fresh so i will add the pics tonight after jon charges the cam!

so when you live somewhere that does not really celebreate holidays that your home country does, it is really easy to forget they are happening! its not all commercialized and there are not ghosts and pumpikns starting you in the face even when you are in the shoe store! but we did know of a big halloween party at a club in kuta and there was a halloween costume contest, which nick was quite sure he could win ( actually had big money prizes) lyds and erin it was nothing like the costume contest we entered at gotham that year.....people were even MORE into?!?! i know! crazy

so even though we had a plan ( which almost got spoiled due to people spreading a bunch of stuff about the bali bombers getting executed that night and how no one should go to kuta) update- they were not executed yet, but sentenced to be executed sometime in the next few days. so yeah we knew where to go but come dinner on friday we sat around the sushi place and were like sooo costumes?? hmmmm

so after dinner we went driving around looking for ideas (which is when i almost ran over the five guys on the sidewalk:) nick decieded ( based on hours of research he conducted that day at global) that he was going to be a 'sugar daddy' and wanted to cover his clothes in sugar packets. hence the halloween sweatshop was born! he bought som goofy hat and we went to bintang to buy millions of safety pins and a five dollar bag of little sugar packets! by this time mel has decided that she is going to wear her load pants which double as pirate pantaloons and be a pirate. im like well i have a red dress and here are some horns so i will be a devil ( i know, most lame and uncreative idea i have ever had in my life!) so we go home and promptly get put to work pinning sugar packets all over nicks clothes! while sugar pinning and fashioning mel an eye patch out of cardboard, she says you should wear something that says prada and b e the devil wears prada! and i said well here it would be prado since everything is fake! and hence i had a somewhat more creative costume:) (consisting of a cardboard PRADO necklace the red dress and some horns!)

driving into town on our motorbikes we notice that NO ONE is wearing costumes except for staff at the bars and clubs but by the time we made it to ocean beach it was packed and loads were dressed up, some half assed, and some out of control!

as for the costume competition, nick mighta had a chance in the "goofiest" category, until this guy ran onstage with a disco ball bike helmet and nothing but a whip cream bikin bottom! nothing under it- he had shame enough to keep smearing it around everytime he thought too much of his bits were showing! but he won in a matter of two seconds and then he did a running leap into the pool- the MC was like please- someone give him a towel!! haha

we met up with some people we knew at ocean beach and went to Mbargo and found jon ( he went before us and i got a txt saying " i think dripping buckets of sweat is hot, do you?" and when i saw him he was literally sweating buckets!!! at this point mel has decided that drinking beer is like water and we need more hard stuff but the whole island is having a shortage of alcohol so they only had like really expensive liqours or flavored vodkas. aboslute pear made its way back into my world.....

we all kinda split up: jon went with his indo woman upstairs, never to be seen again ( till the next day!)

mel and nick were dancing it up with some randoms

i was talking to some aussies we met a few nights earlier

then the best part of the night....mel comes over to where i am and literally like half falls half throws herself onto the couch next to me...the look on her face, with the scull scarf tied around her head and the eye patch lazily hanging somewhere between her eye and her forehead was one i wish i had a picture of. she looked at me with what i can only describe as 'googly eyes' ( in the drunk way, not the oo hoo i facny you way!!!) and just said KAELEN. haha i love seeing stanger drunk like that!

so parties made there way to several locations- super nice villas in jimbaran ( makes our shitbox looks even more shitbox if possible:) villas in hmm somewhere else?? haha Double 6 club and soho for late night food!

yesterday was the most lazy day ever to exist but i was at our friends villa ( the really nice one) and so i got to relax in air conditioning with a tv ( albeit the programming is horrific and runs on a repeated schedule!!) but we got to watch the rugby match and some ridiculous aussie movie so it was all worth it in the end:)

i came home today to find that mel and nick had gone to amed so looks like its just me and jon today.....personally im going to find creepsauce at pleo to get me a massage:)